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| Moving on but not Letting go
No, never again will I go to the comfort room and lock myself in just
to have
some privacy to piteously think of you, cry, sing or do some silly
things
because of you. And no, never will I again think of you last when I
go to sleep.
Sleep is my only rest, so please don't plague me in my dreams.
I've had enough.
No, don't try to reason with me, this is too much.
I will try not to think of you when I wake up in the morning and ask
myself if
somehow you are also awake. I have my own life to lead and my own
life to
think of.
No, I won't even think of you while I'm eating my lunch, wondering if
you're
doing the same thing, because sooner or later I know you will.
I am moving on.
I'll try to wake up in the morning and smile and think not of why you
left but
that once you stayed.
And if I feel the need to cry, it will not be for the future that we
could have, not
for the regrets that I have nor of the anger that I feel, but I will
cry because of a
love that I never was able to share with the one man I felt it for. I
will cry for
the love that was lost, and not for the man who left.
I will give my affections to any man who is in needs of it, but not
my heart
because I'm still trying to get it back from you. I will give him the
love that you
never wanted, the kiss that I so longed to give you and the words
that once
was yours. Worthy or not worthy of it, at least he's here, you're not.
I'll try to hold back the tears when I think of you. I'll just try to
smile.
I am moving on.. and hoping that the next thing would be letting go. | | |
| WHAT REALLY HURTS...
-letting go of a person u've just learned to love
-reminiscing the good times u shared together
(so true...)
-shielding ur heart to love somebody
-trying to hide what u really feel
-trying to hide the tears that involuntarily fall from
ur eyes (HAAAAAY!!!)
-loving a person too much
-giving up someone u never thought of giving up
-having the right love at the wrong time
-taking the risk to fall in love again
-hiding ur relationship from someone else
-controlling ur feelings to avoid hurting a friend
-thinking of him every waking and sleeping moment
knowing all the while that he never even thinks a
single thought of you... (waah!!!!)
-letting go, because everytime you see the person, you
only fall deeper (hmmm...)
-holding back only to find out when it's too late, you
both felt the same way, but were only scared to lose
each other so much that you didn't let the feelings
out
-falling inlove with someone you didnt mean to fall
inlove with
-finding the perfect guy...with only one prob....he
doesnt love you... (...)
-helping the one you love "make ligaw" to your friend
-seeing the one you love crying for someone else
-the waiting also hurts like hell
(AHH...YES... THE WAITING...)
-having to hear "... I've met someone"
-agreeing to his wish to 'just be friends'.
-asking his freedom back bcoz 'he'd be happier with
her'
-asking u to 'forget that everything happened' and be
'normal' friends again.
-hearing that you're treated as a little sis..(ang sakit nun!)
-sharing his future plans for the girl with you..
-stopped being friends bcoz his gf asked him to.
-being denied in front of people.
-telling u lies where he'd been when actually, he was
with a 'new friend' or 'old flame' (whew!)
-he told u he'd be leaving u to return to his ex
-breaking someone's heart
-fighting for that one thing that would make you happy
that is, holding on to a person who can not guarantee
you his commitment unless he fix himself...then, you
are left hanging for the moment...then he says, time
will tell...ang labo lang niya...but you still
decided
to hope in him and trust him
-PRETENDING you're OK when inside you're dying...
(BEEN THERE, DONE THAT!!!)
-PRETENDING to be strong.... and RECOGNIZING your
weakness
-lying in bed each night, thinking of that special
person you can never have...
-being with someone you can't actually love...
-pretending you don't love a person whom you actually
love...
-being in love...
-letting go even if you really don't want to... having
no right to say you are huting because it was your
decision
-seeing the person you love hurt because of you... and
not being able to help that person...
-having the courage to say I LOVE YOU to the person
you love and finding out afterwards that things will
never be the same again when he doesnt treat you with
the same closeness as before
-having to face the fact that someone is capable of
completely destroying the wall that you have set for
yourself, leaving you weak and vulnerable
-admitting that you love someove despite his
imperfections
-finding out that the more you try to hate him, the
more you end up loving him, perhaps even more than
before
-the thought that this guy, used to really love you
and you loved him as well but you didn't give enough
and so he gave up on you
-Sharing the one you love with SOMEBODY else.....
-making a promise....and realizing that when the time
has come for that promise to be delivered....the
commitment is no longer there...
-the hardest thing about love - believing it exists.
(kaya nga....)
The old believe everything;
the middle-aged suspect everything;
the young know everything.
| | |
| NOONG IN-LOVE KA PA
> >
> > Ang sarap ng in-love. Sa unang beses niyo mag-date
> > tapos naramdaman niyo
> > ang sinasabi nilang "spark" nako, magkaharap pa kayo
> > naiisip mo na ang bukas
> > Para matawagan mo na siya at maayang makipag-date
> > ulit, pero sa susunod
> > kayong dalawa na lang. Hindi ka mapakali pag wala
> > siya sa tabi mo o hindi
> > mo siya nakakausap sa isang araw, sigurado at
> > sigurado tatawagan mo siya sa
> > opisina, sa bahay at pag wala doon maglo-load ka sa
> > cellphone mo at uubusuin
> > ang 300 na prepaid sa loob ng isang tawag na wala
> > naman ibang laman kundi
> > bungisngis, kamustahan at kuento tungkol sa lahat ng
> > sama ng loob mo sa mga
> > ex mo. At ang goodbye sa telepono ay nde
> > matapos-tapos, hindi niyo malaman
> > kung sino ang unang magbababa at umaasa kang me
> > "Take care" sa huli. Me
> > email pa yan sa umaga para masabi mo sa kanya na
> > masaya ka na nakapag-usap
> > kayo.
> >
> > Minsang gumimik kayo at upbeat ang sounds, hala!
> > sayaw ka kahit parehong
> > Kaliwa nag mga paa mo, pero gusto niyang sumayaw
> > kaya sige sasayaw ka na
> > rin. Kahit ilang mule, arctic at sub-zero ang
> > orderin niya wala kang
> > pakialam, mas mabuti nga kse nga puede mo na siyang
> > akbayan at I-hug pag
> > medio lasing na siya, pag hindi siya pumalag nako!
> > score! para kang nasa
> > langit. Malamang, matapos mo siyang ma-hug eh ayaw
> > mo nang maligo at lagi
> > mong naaalala ang scent ng pabango niya na me halong
> > amoy alcohol na pero
> > para sa yo mabango pa din siya. At siempre tuwing
> > matapos kayong gumimik eh
> > ayaw mo pa rin matapos ang gabi kaya hihirit ka pa
> > ng coffee, kahit isandaan
> > ang isang baso, "So what?!?" kamo, pera lang yan ang
> > importante kasama mo
> > siya. Masaya ka rin pag na-traffic kayo kse
> > makakapagkuentuhan pa kayo
> > pauwi. Matiyaga mong inaral ang pagda-drive ng
> > manual gamit lang ang isang
> > kamay kse yun isa hawak yun kamay niya o nakadantay
> > sa hita niya habang
> > nagmamaneho ka.
> >
> > Araw-araw magmamakaawa ka na ihatid mo siya at kung
> > puede ka rin niyang
> > Ihatid pauwi, at kung lulusot baka pati lunch eh
> > puede na rin na kayo ang
> > maging lunchmates. Pag me free time ka eh nasa
> > bookstore ka para nagtingin
> > ng mga puedeng ibigay na greeting cards. Nakalimutan
> > mo na ang barkada mo,
> > para sa yo malaking abala lang sila sa napakagandang
> > lovelife mo kesehodang
> > magtampo pa sila sa yo at magsolian na kayo ng
> > kandila sa inaanak mo sa
> > kanila. At kung aalis man kayo nde ka magkasya sa
> > pagte-text lang sa lab mo,
> > kelangan mong pumunta sa banyo para lang
> > magkarinigan kayo pag tinawagan mo
> > siya at sabihin na nde ka nag-eenjoy at mas gusto mo
> > na siya ang kasama.
> > Pagdating ng weekend nako para kang intsik! alas
> > dies pa lang ng umaga nasa
> > kanila ka na at me dalang suhol na breakfast para sa
> > nanay niyang
> > nakasimangot dahil natutulog pa ang anak niya eh
> > andun ka na. Pagdating ng
> > gabi kahit antok na antok na siya eh ayaw mo pa ring
> > umuwi, hinihintay mong
> > makatulog siya sa mga bisig mo para makanakaw ka
> > ulit ng kiss. Iniisip mo
> > rin kung kelan ka kaya niya ipapakilala sa friends
> > niya?
> >
> > Nung kayo na, lahat ng monthsary ice-celebrate niyo,
> > me kasama pang surprise
> > na regalo at date. At nde miminsan mong nabanggit na
> > gusto mo na siyang
> > Pakasalan at wala nang ibang babae sa puso at wala
> > ka nang makikita na
> > katulad niya.
> >
> >
> > AFTER ONE YEAR
> >
> >
> >
> > Mahal ang gimik sa bar, mas maganda kung kakain na
> > lang kayo sa Jollibee at
> > manonood ng sine.
> >
> > Wag na kayo magkape, masyadong mahal with matching
> > comment na "Leche, me
> > ginto ba yan?"
> >
> >
> > Mas gusto mo nang kasama barkada mo dahil "minsan"
> > lang kayo magkita sa
> > isang linggo.
> >
> > Pgakahatid mo sa kanya, nagmamadali kang umuwi sa
> > gabi dahil pagod ka na sa
> > trabaho.
> >
> > Pumapasok at umuuwi na siya mag-isa dahil nde mo
> > siya masusundo dahil puyat
> > ka.
> >
> > Syet! wag ka niyang pipiliting sumayaw at
> > nakakahiya.
> >
> >
> > Anong tawag? Sa load mong 300, mauubos yun at 1
> > beses mo lang tinext
> > (against 245 na text niya sa yo) at 3 minutes mo
> > siyang natawagan. Naubos
> > ang load mo kakatawag sa mga barkada mo at kaka
> > forward ng joke sa kanila.
> >
> > Pag weekend mas gusto mong manood na lang ng TV o
> > matulog. Pupunta ka lang
> > Pag tumawag na siya at nagmamakaawang dalawin mo
> > naman siya at me suhol na
> > ipinagluto ka niya.
> >
> > Kahit automatic na kotse mo nde mo pa rin makuhang
> > hawakan ang kamay niya
> > habang namamaneho ka.
> >
> > Magastos ang mga monthsary, kung anniversary niyo
> > nga eh wala kang regalo,
> > monthsary pa?!?
> >
> > Mag-uusap kayo? Baket me problema ba? Kung wala,
> > isang oras kang manonood ng
> > TV habang siya eh nakatutulog na kahihintay na
> > kausapin mo siya.
> >
> >
> > Miss na niyang ini-email mo siya,sagot mo? "Jusko
> > naman araw-araw na Tayong
> > nag-uusap ano pa ba naman ang sasabihin ko sa yo?
> > Baka gusto mo pa ng
> > card?!?"
> >
> > Pag aayain ka niya para gumimik with her friends ang
> > sagot mo? "Utang na
> > loob, kung gusto mong lumabas kasama friends mo ikaw
> > na lang mag-isa at
> > naiilang ako."
> >
> > Pero pag lalabas kayo with your friends umiinit ulo
> > mo pag tahimik siya pag
> > nagjo-joke sila tungkol sa inyo ng ex mo sabay
> > tanong "Nde ka ba nag-eenjoy?
> > Buiset, umuwi na nga lang tayo!"
> >
> > At tungkol naman sa kasal..."Jusko naman, nde mo ba
> > ako maintindihan?!? Wala
> > pa akong pera saka nde ko maiisip yan ngayon! Sana
> > wag ka namang makulit."
> >
> > Sa lahat ng ito, ngingiti na lang siya, iisipin
> > lahat ng ginagawa mo noong
> > nanliligaw ka pa malamang umaasa pa yun na babalik
> > yun dati sabay
> > buntung-hininga at sabi ng malakas..."Kay sarap ng
> > in-love."
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U said one day isn't enough to luv me..not enough for forever..
THIS IS WHAT A GIRL TOLD A GUY:
If you see me walking on the road with someone else, It's not because I like his accompany... It’s because you're not brave enough to walk beside me. If you hear me talking about him all the time Its not because he pleases me Its because you're too deaf to hear my heartbeat If you feel me falling with someone new Its not because I love him.. But because you're not there to catch me fall If you feel lost, I too am nowhere I too don't know where the road is going Are we gonna cross each other's path Or just completely turn around?.. Will we just let go of what we had Or go to the place where love is bound Don't let me walk with him, It's you I want to walk with.. Don't let me talk of him, it's you I want to talk with.. Don't let me fall for him, It's you I want to fall in love with..
"HOW DID THE GUY REPLY?"
When you thought I wasn't brave enough to walk beside you I was behind you every step of the way Still filled with awe because of the beauty that stand before me When you thought I was too deaf to hear your heartbeat I didn't want to assume anything And I was afraid to lose our friendship When you thought I wasn't there to catch you, It was because you never gave me the chance You never reached the bottom, you've already grabbed a branch If you feel like you are nowhere, I too am lost I too don't know where the road is going Are we just going to turn around, Or are we gonna cross each other's path? Will we just let go of what we had Or go to the place where love is bound? Don't let me walk alone I want to walk by your side Don't let me talk of something else It's you I want to talk with Don't let me fall for someone else It's you I want to fall in love with. WHEN I SAW YOU... I WAS AFRAID TO TALK TO YOU... WHEN I TALKED TO YOU... I WAS AFRAID TO HOLD YOU... WHEN I HOLD YOU... I WAS AFRAID TO LOVE YOU... NOW THAT I LOVE YOU ... I'M AFRAID TO LOSE YOU... SOMETIMES LOVE HURTS... BUT IF IT DOESN'T HURT... THEN IT ISN'T LOVE... HOLD ON TO THE PERSON U LOVE... BEFORE HE/SHE SLIPS AWAY... AND U CAN NEVER GET HIM/HER BACK.... | | |
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